The Office Worker’s Survival Guide to Big Projects

survival-guide-book-half-open-thumbs-upAs a professional office lurker I know of the pits and dangers, everyone faces when they join a firm or company dealing. It doesn’t matter what organization you join. Be ready to experience what everyone dreads in the cubicle jungle – big, bad projects. The kind that huffs and puffs, until chairs remain empty and those unfortunate assemble new CVs and begin the journey to new habitats. Those who do survive are often left scarred and exhausted, left alone to recharge until the next projects makes its way through the corporate calender. Oh my. Quite dismal now, isn’t it.

Worry not. Advice is under way, because there is nothing quite as satisfactory as remaining among the sole survivors after this informational disaster hits, get an exceptional performance review and live to fight another day. You will certainly learn how to best do this, the following ways:

 

1] Cut down your work. The less you have to do means the less you can be held responsible for, which is something to look forward to, if you know a project is a step away from catastrophe. You can either pretend you have way more than you have to do or you delegate tasks to other colleagues. This works best when you have already seized a spot higher in the food chain and can easily force newer employees into doing your work.

2] Mix and match. I don’t generally advise to multi-task as it makes you all the more prone to mistakes, but in some cases, it might be good to actually do two or three things at once, as long as they have a lot in common. If you have to research for cleaners in Bristol to clean a property in the future and at the same time contact tenants living in the same property, then why not call them as you look for companies to come clean. Easy as that when they are related like this.

3] Stage a melt-down. Not very popular and doesn’t earn you brownie points, but sometimes you have to fake it, if you want to keep your skin and that means to let people know you have had with this project. A melt-down easily has people back away from you as if you’re well-being is directly tied with what they will tell you, which is the whole purpose. You need to add a wee bit of control to the mix, so something as simple as a bit of theatre can easily fix that. Control what you do, who you see and you will make the last stretch in the project all the more manageable.

As I said, these are survival techniques. Some are normal, others noble and some not really savoury. You decide how to operate, but you have to understand one thing, once you go inside the cubicle jungle, you really need a weapon to succeed.

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